Nursery school tours & my sweaty self

What can I say about the nursery school process? It is a weird bizarre world and I”m in it. Um…hello? Am I going crazy? Do I really have to start applying now? According to some, yes I do. Maggie is 10 months old and I’ve been stressing about which nursery school (aka pre-school) we will be sending her to. Actually, let me rephrase. I’m stressing out about which nursery schools we will be applying to, waiting to hear about our acceptance, and then paying thousands of dollars to.

This dilemna has kept me up at nights. I’ve read articles, reviews, and books. I’m now going to “walking tours” of the schools. Today I went to a very reputable school, the whole thing was a disaster. First of all, I didn’t know you shouldn’t bring your child. Right when I walked in I noticed I was the only parent with a child. I was horrified. I actually made up the excuse that my sitter was sick. I’m already lying to a school that I haven’t even applied to. After we get a lovely long winded recommendation from a parent who is sitting in the small room with us, the school director begins to give us a tour. In some ways, I understood why we need to see the school, but really? I don’t need to see every classroom and every teacher. I’m a little confused why the school director was pushing so hard to show us how great their school is. Guess what? I’ve read about your school, I wouldn’t be here if I didn’t already know it was great and the possibility that Maggie will get in is pretty slim. Other than being an amazing baby, Maggie doesn’t have anything going for her. She is an upper middle class, white, half jewish girl in LA. She is not a dime a dozen. This is why I’m already applying, we need to be the first white, half jewish family on the list. Let’s get moving on this tour.

So here I am carrying Maggie on the school tour for an hour and 15 minutes. I’m clearly not prepared for this, I’m sweating, and I have no questions to ask. Not to mention everyone else’s kids are between 18-22 months and at home with their nannies. I feel like the mom who showed up naked. I’m sweating, unprepared and Maggie is bored and getting fussy. Everyone is complimenting me on how well behaved she is, clearly meaning “Why would you ever bring a baby to a tour?” I finally excuse myself and compliment the school director on an informative and amazing tour. Maggie and I drag ourselves to the car, I give her a bottle and take my hair extensions out. Yep, I decided to look like the hip mom with long fun hair, instead I was the haggard dumb ass mom with a baby.

For those of you that haven’t done the math. Maggie is 10 months old and I’m touring schools that she will be attending when she is 3. That’s right. I’m touring schools that she will be attending in 2 years. Honestly, I’ve already spent more time on Maggie’s nursery school applications than I did on my college. I’m not kidding, I was oblivious to the college admissions process during highschool. I only realized I needed to apply after I graduated. So clearly, my view of Maggie’s intended education is different than the education I allowed myself to have. Apparently, I should have paid more attention to my education. I should have gone on more college tours. I would have known to not bring a baby or wear hair extensions to a school tour.

Coulda, woulda, shoulda…

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