No longer gassy in 2012. Hello 2013.

2012 was the year of figuring out me.  I’ve never been more comfortable with who I am than I am now, and I have this last year to thank for that.  Not only emotionally, but physically as well.

So here is what happened.  I had minor surgery (nothing to talk about), but after I recovered AJ mentioned that I should go to the doctor, to see why I’m so tired in the evenings.  Seriously?  I didn’t want to pay a $35 copay in order for a doctor to tell me that I’m normal.  I’m tired in the evenings because I spend 12 hours a day running around after a toddler.  I think why I’m tired is pretty obvious.  Doesn’t matter, I decided to go to the doctor, because AJ kept insisting and his parents were in town, so I had a free babysitter.  Bonus!

While at the doctor, I realized I have several ongoing ailments that have been recurring my entire life.  I talk to the doctor about everything and he takes a blood test.  They rule out everything.  Then he tells me, he thinks my problems are food related.  What?  I’m pretty healthy.  For years, I was a pescatarian (Vegetarian that eats fish) and only since being pregnant with Maggie have I added chicken back into my diet.  Not to mention we eat mostly organic, farm fresh foods.  So food should not be an issue.

I was wrong.  So it turns out that my body is intolerant of many foods.  Basically I am gluten intolerant and dairy intolerant among many other intolerances.  My food intolerances are labeled in three categories, severe, moderate, and mild.

Just so you can get a taste of what I have to avoid.  My severe intolerances are:  gluten, dairy, green tea, black tea, almonds, beef, blueberries, caraway, chick peas(hummus), halibut, millet, orange, papaya, quinoa, vanilla, soy, rice and high fructose corn syrup.  That is the severe column.  There are around 50 other items in the moderate a mild columns too.

In order to see if these foods were affecting my life I had to cut everything out of my diet that I was intolerant too, all of the severe, moderate and mildly intolerant foods.  So for four months I did it.  At first I was miserable.  I cried.  Then after a couple of months I noticed, I didn’t have any more skin rashes, no more headaches, no more aches and pains, no more bloating, no more mouth ulcers, and less exhaustion.  Amazing!  Let me tell you, I don’t think I realized how gassy I was before my new diet.  I think I probably farted everyday, because I thought that was normal.  I’m not talking gross fraternity boy farts, just little toots throughout the day.  Not to mention daily gas cramps.  So the first time I tooted on my new diet, I was so completely aware of it,  I actually called AJ to tell him I tooted.  He was not as thrilled as me, but happy that I was less gassy, probably happy for both of us.  Let’s be honest, he has had to deal with a lot, I tooted constantly.  In nine years of being together, AJ has never passed gas in front of me.  So now I know why he was pushing me to go to the doctor.  I don’t think it was because of my constant exhaustion from chasing a toddler for 12 hours, I think it was to stop my farting.

Well played AJ, well played.  I thank you for making me less of a gross person.

So for 2013 my goal is to get rid of PMS.  This really is exciting for both of us.  Can you imagine?  No farting and no PMS, AJ will be in heaven.




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